TOBY:
Ladies and gentlemen,
May I have your attention, perlease?
Are your nostrils aquiver and tingling as well
At that delicate, luscious ambrosial smell?
Yes they are, I can tell.
Well, ladies and gentlemen,
That aroma enriching the breeze
Is like nothing compared to its succulent source,
As the gourmets among you will tell you, of course.
Ladies and gentlemen,
You can't imagine the rapture in store —
Just inside of this door!

There you'll sample
Mrs. Lovett's meat pies,
Savory and sweet pies,
As you'll see.
You who eat pies,
Mrs. Lovett's meat pies
Conjure up the treat pies
Used to be!

MRS. LOVETT:
Toby!

TOBY:
Coming!

MRS. LOVETT:
Ale there!

TOBY:
Right, mum!

MRS. LOVETT:
Quick, now!

MRS. LOVETT:
Nice to see you, dearie . ..
How have you been keeping? ...
Cor, me bones is weary!
Toby — One for the gentleman . . .
Hear the birdies cheeping —
Helps to keep it cheery . . .
Toby!
Throw the old woman out!

MRS. LOVETT:
What's my secret?
Frankly, dear — forgive my candor —
Family secret,
All to do with herbs.
Things like being
Careful with your coriander,
That's what makes the gravy grander — !

MRS. LOVETT & TOBY:
Eat them slow and
Feel the crust, how thin I (she) rolled it!
Eat them slow, 'cos
Every one's a prize!
Eat them slow, 'cos
That's the lot and now we've sold it!
Come again tomorrow — !

MRS. LOVETT:
Hold it!
Bless my eyes —
Fresh supplies!

How about it, dearie?
Be here in a twinkling!
Just confirms my theory —
Toby—!
God watches over us.
Didn't have an inkling . . .
Positively eerie . . .

TOBY:
Is that a pie
Fit for a king,
A wondrous sweet
And most delectable
Thing?
You see, ma'am, why
There is no meat pie

MRS. LOVETT:
Toby!
Throw the old woman out!