Well I had me a job and everything was goin' pretty good you see
I had me some money and a pretty little honey to love me
Then Ukulele Bailey he came on to the scene
And with a smooth singin' and a sweet pickin' he stole my baby from me
Well he would sit every night in front of her window and sang to her bout romance
And I lost my baby to Ukulele Bailey I didn't have a fight to chance
I saw a ad in a magazine I'm gonna get into the act
They say you can play the uke in just five days or you get your money back
[ ukulele ]
Well my correspondence course finally came in the mail and I practiced every day
But I guess I must've been pretty bad cause the neighbors started movin' away
Well I planked and I thumped and I planked and I thumped
Until my plankin' thumper got sore
But I gotta learn to play that old ukulele or I won't see baby no more
Well I practiced my singin' everyday
But everybody said that I ought to throw the towel in
Cause every time I start to singing all the dogs would start to howlin'
But Ukulele Bailey he's got my baby so I won't give up give in
I'm gonna learn to play that old ukulele and win baby back again
[ guitar ]
And win baby back again