I was down in Southern Watch flying my F-16
When lead called for the picture and AWACS came back
But I saw a contact on my scope and it was runnin' hot
Although I wasn't targeted I went ahead and shot
Now I never even noticed that my nose was pointed east
And that Iranian fighter pilot was surprised to say the least
I tried to take it back but by then it was too late
And a million angry Arabs started heading for Kuwait

So here's to you fighter pilots victors of the war
That got us all this real estate that's backed up to the shore
And now oil's a buck a barrel and it's all because of me
'Cause I'm the motherfucker who started World War III

Now you knew the fuckin' French would have to get into the mess
American audacity well it had to be addressed
So they sent their fighters to the sky but it was all in vain
As they sought asylum in the American commonwealth of Spain
So the English crossed the channel and it was a sight to see
When the queen dropped down her trousers and she shit on Normandy
And if you think we were happy when we drank all of their wine
You should've seen the Polacks when they got to cross the Rhine

So here's to you fighter pilots victors of the war
That got us all this real estate that's backed up to the shore
And now they whistle Dixie in the streets of gay Paris
'Cause I'm the motherfucker who started World War III

The Chinese threatened action when we overran Saigon
And then a thousand drunken frat boys had to moon them from Taiwan
But the bombing of the embassy in Moscow broke the ice
Now that was just an accident and it happened only twice
So they launched their MiGs two by two never to return
No matter how much we shot 'em down they never seemed to learn
Their suicidal bravery made us feel bad for them
So on Tuesdays it was heaters only, Wednesday BFM

So here's to you fighter pilots victors of the war
That got us all this real estate that's backed up to the shore
And now China's just a word that you read in history
'Cause I'm the motherfucker who started World War III