You beat the game, you're feelin' pretty cool
You stayed up all night and missed a day of school
You played like a champ, so what do you get?
37 pounds of jack-shit

Well, look at you kid, your thumbs are big and red
You smell like a taint,
Your goldfish is dead, so here's your reward:
Excessive amounts of names you can't even pronounce!
We're talkin'
Taku Hikichi and Keiichi Hara
And Morikazu Maru Maru (A wah wah wah wah wah wah)
Penpen, Ban Ban, Bunbun, Tom Pon, and Faw
Road Zapper and Nakazoo (Ohai!)

And after the creds, which took a fuckin' while
A crappy cartoon all pixelated style
No trophies today, achievements no way!
It's all for naught!
For diddly-biddly squat, and

That's how it goes with classic games
Cutscenes that blow and ricemobile names
Your hopes were so high, so much was in store
It's the end, but wait, there's more
Another screen, another door, hey

"Thank you for playing", well, ain't that sweet?
Clearly our lives are now complete
Despite how it ends, you'll play it again
But for now my friend, this is the end!

I love you baby,
Try it on hard mode, this is the fuckin' end

Conglaturation!

I've never seen such finger speed
Let's get a burger, it was a dream
We won't tell if Jason died so
Stare at your brother's head in the sky
This is the fuggin', the sweet mother-huggin' end!
Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa
Whoa-yeah!